I will write my arse off for you. My writing is always interesting because I drink a lot of coffee and I'm funny! Seriously, I excel with dialogue. Love "If Google was a Guy", I can write like that, too. Here is a sample of funny here and there, the intro to the book I've been working on. The pdf, full book, is in my portfolio. :D
Murmur, Chapter 1:
“Well... I'm not from here.”
“Oh, right, I remember that. You said you were from Saint Croix, right?”
“Yeah, but not born there.”
She had a funny way of being elusive.
“Uh, where were you born?”
Very long pause.
“A place people don't know about. It's sort of an underwater cave, under the ocean floor.”
Only in California.
I looked at her, expecting to see a sly little smirk on her golden porcelain face. She looked hard into my eyes. They were looking straight into me, lively and intense. Not smiling.
Uh oh. Was I laying naked next to a crazy girl? I mean woman? She was forty, but looked thirty two, and ran around with me like she was twenty five. I was twenty nine, and just barely kept up with her this past night, our third night together since I'd been away for six weeks...... I laughed a silly, jittery laugh, like a hiccup repeating itself. A very light sweat started behind my ears and moved down my neck, then crossed my forehead. My body felt suddenly rigid, and not in a good way, as my mouth went dry as a Utah salt-flat in August. I began to speak, but my mouth just made a clicking little smack......